THE CALMSWAN GURDJIEFF CHRONICLESS 09-08-2006

THE CALMSWAN GURDJIEFF CHRONICLES

ONE PERSON'S EXPERIENCE IN THE GURDJIEFF WORK


Copyright © 2004-2009 Nosrepa de Mannu. All rights reserved.




Originally uploaded to Scribd.com April 18b, 2009.
October 10, 2009 - Chapter 26 edited for improved clarity.
May 12, 2012 - Chapter 51(principally), and ff. through Chapter 59, edited
for improved clarity.
Also available online at http://sirhute.com/the-calmswan-gurdjieff-
chronicles.doc
& http://sirhute.com/the-calmswan-gurdjieff-chronicles.pdf but internal
links work properly only in downloaded Word file, i.e. not when reading
from Scribd.
Email Author: calmswan@gmail.com


"We shall not cease from exploration
And the end of all our exploring
Will be to arrive where we started
And know the place for the first time.
Through the unknown, unremembered gate
When the last of earth left to discover
Is that which was the beginning;
At the source of the longest river
The voice of the hidden waterfall
And the children in the apple-tree
Not known, because not looked for
But heard, half-heard, in the stillness
Between two waves of the sea.
Quick now, here, now, always-
A condition of complete simplicity
(Costing not less than everything)
And all shall be well and
All manner of thing shall be well
When the tongues of flame are in-folded
Into the crowned knot of fire
And the fire and the rose are one."

-T. S. Eliot, "Four Quartets," "Quartet No. 4: Little Gidding"
(end of Stanza 5)






The poetry above is far better than the entire essay that follows.

This would be a good place to stop reading.








Well, if you insist...


Table of Contents
Ctrl/left-click to jump to any titled section.

1. PREFACE: A WAY STATION CREDO 5
Objectivity 5
Escaping the Personal 7
Beyond Consciousness 9
Directing Attention 13
Peering Around Cognition 15
Beyond Cognition 15
A Practical Guide to Here-Now 16
The Innocence of Pure Awareness 18
Defense and Attack 20
Questioning Time 21
Bohm's Cylinder 23
Duality 25
Dissolving 'Me' 26
2. THE STORY BEHIND THE STORY OF CALMSWAN 30
3. CALMSWAN 31
The Personages 31
Beyond Good and Bad 34
Roles or Simplicity? 37
As Others See Us 39
Heroes 39
A Fisheye World 40
The Innocent Unity of 'Me' 42
4. A BUNCH OF WORDS 45
5. DEDICATION AND CAVEAT 46
6. ONCE UPON A TIME 49
7. BOOTED OUT 50
8. THE SCREAMING 51
9. HEARTACHE 52
10. BUSINESS-AS-USUAL 53
11. EMOTIONS AND REALITY 57
12. THE INNOCENCE OF IT ALL 59
13. MAKING AN UNNECESSARY SCENE 61
14. APPLIED PSYCHOLOGY 61
15. THE ROLE OF MARC 63
16. MARC, THE LORD, AND SAMUEL 67
17. MARC'S BELL CURVE 68
18. THE CALMSWAN DEMOGRAPHIC 69
19. MARC'S COMMITMENT TO "A RESPECTED MAN OF THE WORK" 71
20. HANK AND WALTER MITTY 73
21. MARC'S CAPACITY FOR ATTENTION 77
22. FIFTEEN MINUTES OF STEADY ATTENTION 79
23. FIFTEEN MINUTES VERSUS FIFTEEN SECONDS 80
24. THE GUILTY LITTLE BOY 83
25. WARMTH, DIRECTNESS, AND BULLHEADEDNESS 84
26. A REPEATED REMINDER TO PAY ATTENTION 85
27. ATTENTION IN THE GURDJIEFF MOVEMENTS (SACRED DANCES) 89
28. AN EXCITING CRAPSHOOT 95
29. THE FOUNDATION'S CREATION OF A TRADITION 98
30. PARALLELS: CALMSWAN'S APPROACH TO MOVEMENTS; MARC'S APPROACH TO PIANO
100
31. A PEEK AT THE MEN'S WEEKEND OF MAY 2004 103
Nosrepa's Favorite Moth Story 104
Beyond the Moth Story 107
32. GAMES AND MACHISMO 109
33. AN AWAKENED ASSHOLE? 111
34. THE REAL REASON 114
35. THE SECRET 119
36. SECRECY IN THE CALMSWAN EQUATION 123
37. THE TOME 125
Beelzebub's Tales: An Overview Askance 125
Synopsis 127
Silence and Monkeys 133
An Alternative View 134
The Present Moment Obfuscated 135
Getting Bogged Down at Karnak 137
A Refreshing Interlude of Synchronicity 139
Ecclesiastes, B.T., and NOW 141
The Gurdjieff "Work" Seen Through 143
Confusing the Troops 146
Stalking the Wild Essence-Vow 147
38. INTERLUDE 148
39. GOO 151
40. MARC AND ZEN 152
41. THE BENEFIT OF CALMSWAN MEMBERSHIP 155
42. THE REAL WORK 156
43. CURATORS OR GARDENERS? 159
44. FUN 163
45. MISUNDERSTANDING 164
46. A GUIDE TO REFINING MOTION IN SERVICE TO MUSIC 166
47. THE RIGHT NOTES 168
48. HOW I WISH IT HAD BEEN . . . 169
49. . . . AND WHY IT WASN'T 170
The Big Esoteric Secret about the 'Gurdjieff' Music 172
Performing the "Gurdjieff Music" Objectively 174
50. ENDINGS, BEGINNINGS, AND DUALITY 180
51. THE MOTHER OF ALL DUALITIES 184
52. GOOD AND EVIL 188
53. EMPATHY AND RESPECT 194
54. BUSINESS-AS-USUAL ON THE MUSIC TEAM 196
55. MARC'S MUSICAL MACHINATIONS 199
Game 1: 199
Game 2: 200
56. GRATITUDE AND BEMUSEMENT 203
57. THE FUTURE OF CALMSWAN 205
58. A TIME AND A SEASON 208
59. A FEW LOOSE ENDS 212
Nisargadatta, A Course in Miracles, and Sartrep 212
Here, Now, Always 213
Explaining "an undefined task" 214
"The Needs of Members of Religious Cults" 215
A Final Word: Nisargadatta with a Dash of Pema Chodron 217


1. PREFACE: A WAY STATION CREDO

Return to T.O.C.




This is a personal statement not based upon any erudition. It derives
merely from getting up daily and looking around, while noticing that I am
here and while questioning everything. This credo can be no more than
partially true, because it is a product of incomplete objectivity. One
senses that all credos are ephemeral, and that there exists a place of
objectivity beyond time and beyond all credos.





There is more than a little truth to the adage, "Those that speak do not
know; those that know do not speak." But thank god for the simplicity of a
Nisargadatta, who both knew and spoke:


"On realization, you feel complete, fulfilled, free from the
pleasure-pain complex, and yet not always able to explain what
happened, why and how. You can put it only in negative terms:
"Nothing is wrong with me any longer". It is only by comparison with
the past that you know that you are out of it. Otherwise, you are
just yourself. Don't try to convey it to others. If you can, it is
not the real thing. Be silent and watch it expressing itself in
action."


-Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj




Even faith in God is only a stage on the way. Ultimately, you
abandon all, for you come to something so simple that there are no
words to express it.
--Sri Nisargadatta Maharaj


The Old Testament book of Ecclesiastes warns that within our shared dream
all is "vanity," "meaningless," and that "...the writing of many books is
endless, and excessive devotion to books is wearying to the body" [12:12
NASB 1995]. But Ecclesiastes says also, "Whatever presents itself for you
to do, do it with all your might..." [9:10 GOD'S WORD, 1995]. Go figure.
Then continue reading, or not:







Objectivity

Return to T.O.C.

To be human is to be incapable of objectivity. Human perception is by
default fragmentary and identified with the personal. Bias is inevitable.
Misjudgment occurs. Inappropriate reaction follows not far behind.

Rarely if ever do I question my apperception or understand how pre-
programmed by nature and by nurture has been my cognition. From earliest
childhood I have been taught to believe in my separate existence, and in
that as a tenuous situation in need of constant protection and
reinforcement.



"'In infinite time, in infinite matter, in infinite space an organic
cell stands out, will hold together awhile and then burst, and that
cell is Me.'


This was an agonizing fallacy, but it was the sole, the supreme
result of centuries of human thought in that direction.

It was the ultimate belief on which all the systems of thought
elaborated by the human mind in almost all their ramifications were
based. It was the dominant conviction, and of all other explanations
Levin had unconsciously chosen it, without knowing when or how, as
being at any rate the clearest, and made it his own."


-Tolstoy, Anna Karenin [sic], translated by Rosemary Edmonds
(London, New York: Penguin Books, 1978 paperback), p:823


I live in the shadow of "the ultimate belief," the "dominant conviction." I
have "...unconsciously chosen it, without knowing when or how..." I fail to
realize that I am largely given over to automatic behavioral patterns that
derive from a basic misconception of what I am.



Escaping the Personal

Return to T.O.C.



I begin to correct my misconception of what I am whenever I practice
noticing more of the contents of the present moment without judging them.

I notice this body here-now, both vis-à-vis those contents and in contact
with those contents. I notice the body's breathing, and the little gap
after each exhalation before the following inhalation. I use the gap to
allow a small shift in perception away from cognitive judgment and toward
alert acceptance. The body relaxes.